I am not “sick again”

Over the last 10 years as I have walked this incredibly challenging journey of chronic pain and chronic illness I have been blown away at how often people comment or say “are you sick AGAIN”.

The answer to this from someone living with 3 auto immune diseases and pulmonary obstructive airway disease is NO I am just living with chronic disease. This means that my immune system is fighting me constantly. It means that I am susceptible to flares, infections, constant pain and chest infections.

I however don’t “look” sick a lot of the time and I make a conscious effort to get up and keep moving every day. This is not something that is easy to do and is a very challenging journey a lot of the time. It takes a commitment, focus and a deep love for myself to get up and do whatever is possible on any given day.

Chronic pain is just that a constant burning pain that doesn’t go away. It is relentless and can be extremely debilitating. I have days when it takes a lot of self motivation to get up and move as sometimes I just want to pull the duvet over my head and not face the world.

At the moment I have a bone in my shoulder that is degenerating, no skin on my feet, bursitis in both my hips, compartment syndrome in my calves and sympathetic reflex dystrophy in my right arm, psoriatic arthritis and fibromyalgia. It’s a very interesting journey I am walking and it comes with waves of depression, anxiety and frustration.

However I have SO much to be grateful for and I am surrounded by kind, caring and motivational family and friends and a truly amazing therapist who support me and get up and swim in the mornings with me, walk in the evenings with me and just love me warts and all.

So when you feel overwhelmed and challenged put up your hand and ask for help. On the tough days get into nature and embrace its beauty and remind yourself of all the blessings in your life. It really really does help.

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