Living in a space where so much in my world is upside down and foreign to me at the moment, I have found an incredible blessing in simply understanding more about my boundaries. I have found a way of confronting the awkward gut feelings and intuition we all have and just owning exactly what I feel in the moment. I have confronted that saying there is always a reason for everything in life and have had endless hours of lying in bed to understand what that really means.
Being authentic and real at all times is not often the popular choice but when you are facing your mortality on a daily basis it becomes your reality. I have never been known to suffer fools easily but in the same sense I have been a truly generous, eager to help a good cause in any way I can kind of person throughout my life.
The thing that has completely floored me over the last 5 months while I have literally died 3 times and stopped breathing on so many occasions is how few people are who they project to the world they are. How few people have a deep sense of community and how to show up and be present in times of crisis.
You see for me I find it simple to show up for the people I care about in my life. It’s how I am made. I am an empath and as my teacher calls me, I am the wounded healer. So I have always been the person who will cook you a meal or pick up your kids or walk your dogs or hold your hand or be your shoulder when it all seems too much to handle. I have always been that person to arrange the get together and rally behind people when they need it most. It’s the way Great Spirit made me.
One of my most dear and special friends said to me the other day. Tell me how you feel. Tell me what I can do, how I can help and what it is you need during this time as I see you are feeling frustrated. I just broke down in tears and said Thank you. Thank you for taking the time to ask. Thank you for taking the time to not assume and thank you for taking the time to just show up.
Living with the latest results and the diagnosis I recently received has meant that I am very isolated and doing anything requires planning and consideration of what environment I am going to, what I may be exposed to and how long I will last where I am going before I will need to leave. Every inch of who I have been for the last 46 years is being tested and changed and I am mourning parts of myself that I have to let go of as I am no longer that person. That is just my reality.
I have learnt more about looking at the world and people that I share my energy and heart with from a very different angle. With the current global energy and various levels of unrest and challenges there comes a time when the distribution of your energy is needed for a more focused cause. And being available to everyone and helping every cause is no longer possible. But the greatest challenge has been discovering quite brutally I might add how few of the “Friends” in my life have shown up and been present. And the acceptance and release of that everything is always as it should be. The initial heartache of the loss of the people you believed to be your friends who you have stood by through thick and thin just don’t step up to the plate.
I have discovered a great teaching on this 9 year journey but particularly over the last 5 months. And that is there are people who need you to fit in particular box for them to be comfortable. That box is one of the high energy, enthusiastic, always available listening and shoulder to lean on friend. However when you can’t be all that to them as you are fighting to survive it’s amazing to discover who really does have your back when the chips are down.
My spiritual teachings remind me that everyone comes into our lives for a reason, a season or a lifetime. Some people come into our lives to teach us something and once we have learnt it they are no longer in our lives and some people come into our lives for a lifetime and these are the people that show up in the toughest of times. These are the people who walk their talk. The people who don’t have to be by your side all the time but who are conscious enough to just drop you a call or send you a message.
You see to show up and be present for me requires very little more than just sending me a message to say thinking of you. Sending love. It’s not a big ask and it costs very little in time or money but makes the world of difference to someone isolated and feeling very alone to know that they are loved and validated in some way. We all need to be validated on some level it’s a human disposition.
The material over commercialized stuff that people give so much time to and invest so much energy into really doesn’t matter when it comes to the crunch. What matters is your sense of determination, and your self value.
What matters is how you treat people and when you look at how you treat people it is important to remember is not to have a vested interest in how those people treat you in return. Life is flawed by one core thing that creates numerous misconceptions and many a disappointed people. It’s called expectation. We all have certain preconceived expectations of people whether they are conscious of it or not. The challenge lies in having these expectations and not communicating them. How is that we can expect anyone to understand what our expectations are unless we make them clear.
We have all invested way too much of our lives as slaves to a system that is so unbelievably inept and dysfunctional in so many ways that it has created this hamster wheel of stress.
We as the human race have treated the earth and all the blessings of natural resources freely available to us with such gluttony and greed that the damage is now at a point where the earth is fighting back! Natural disasters are the earths way of culling over populated areas. We have no one to blame for this but ourselves and the complete overconsumption and desire for more. When is it enough. When do we as the human race WAKEUP. When do we stand up and say enough is enough.
Well I am standing up and I am doing what i can to be the change I seek in the world. I am standing up and working with what makes my soul smile and am connecting with projects that I feel need assistance. I choose to be a person who creates the change she desires in the world. I ask you all to do the same. Set your boundaries, communicate your expectations, do the work and reap the reward be it financially, spiritually or emotionally.
Life is all about seasons reasons and lifetimes. It’s about making a conscious decision to call yourself up on your shit, acknowledge your good and bad traits and honour yourself completely by practising self love. To make this clear self love is the most challenging journey of it all and it will carry many stumbling blocks and challenges but ultimately it is what we all need to embrace as our most important one. As if we do not love ourselves how can it be possible for anyone to love us.
Be who you are authentically and own your space. Love who you are completely and love your space. Stand in the power of self love to the point when your cup overflows, then and only then can you be the vessel for anyone to connect and plug into. And only work with and connect with people who get who you are.
There has come a time our world to reconnect with all that is real, pure and authentic. The time has come to connect to your desired journey and to go out and achieve it. Life is short.
So today when you get up and start you day make your first empowering move with intention and go and vote. Then connect with what makes your soul smile from there on out anything is possible and that too is exactly as it should be.