One of the greatest lessons I am learning at the moment is to be able to truly understand what my capacity as a person is right now in the current place my body is at. For the last 9 years since I was diagnosed I have been trying so hard to do what I believed was best serving my body. I have gotten up and shown up every day as I truly do want to be well and “normal” again. I have worked with exercise, nutrition and cognitive behavioural therapy. I have well and truly gone to places I never thought a person could go and I have dug deep on many days to just keep the focus.
The one key thing that I have not always done though is just know my limits in the now. I have been on some level of complete denial that when my body has been screaming at me to stop and rest that I just need to focus and push through. While it is true that focus, determination and true belief can get you through most if not all things, sometimes what you really need is to just stop and rest.
Our bodies are the most amazing things and all the stuff that operates in our bodies ultimately comes from the brain. It is the message centre that sends off all the messages down the spinal cord and ultimately alerts us to where the pain of problem is.
When these message centres are interrupted or not “firing” like they should normally be it can be a complete shit storm in your body. I know this storm I live it every day of my life and I am doing all I can to get it back on track. The one area I have been most challenged in is communicating when I have been in too much pain to really push myself in a healthy nurturing way.
The way we communicate with ourselves and nurture ourselves is so important in daily living as at the end of the day only you as an individual can be the protector of your own body and wellbeing. The current pace of life and constant expectation of the world as a whole to be connected, available and responsive 24/7 has meant more more people are pushing their bodies beyond what is naturally, healthy and nurturing for our bodies and overall wellness.
Setting boundaries and understanding your limits is essential to life. I have personally struggled with this for years. I am a complete empath and if someone or something is in need I automatically want to help and solve, save or rescue the person, animal or situation. The reality is I will always be that type of person BUT the most important thing to remember if this is you is to check in with YOU first. Ask yourself can I give this my energy and do I have the capacity to help without putting myself at risk.
Boundaries are healthy and completely necessary for daily survival. Boundaries are about self love, selflessness and being the best version of who you can be. I have done a lot of work on learning how to be kinder to myself and aware of my personal needs over the last 12 years but have still pushed myself beyond my limits many times due to unrealistic expectations of myself.
The key here is that no one and no situation is responsible for this except me. No one can MAKE us feel anything or do anything in life as we ALWAYS have a choice. That is how we were made. As human beings one of the greatest gifts we have been blessed with is Choice and the right to choose.
I know there are many situations in real life where we feel we don’t have choice and there are many stressful situations globally right now where people’s right to choose has been taken away or controlled by outside people and things. In these situations however we do still have a choice as small as it sounds and as irrelevant as it may seem to some of you we always have the choice on how we react or respond to the situation.
Yes there are many stressful influencing factors in our daily lives, far too many in comparison for how we as human beings were created to be. There is too much noise, too much “plugging in” too much clutter and too many expectations from outside factors on what we BELIEVE is needed or required from us in order to validate our existence on some level.
Over the last 5 weeks my body has faced so much trauma, so much pain and so much discomfort that I have had to simply STOP on all levels and just listen. I have had to face my mortality head on and truly get perspective of what is real and what is necessary in life for my own survival and it is really very simple.
It all just boils down to knowing your limits. It’s about putting stress and pressure into perspective and managing how you respond to outside demands and the “urgent” needs of others with clarity and perspective.
The language we use daily has a massive impact on us too as we take on pressure or create additional pressure when we think that if we don’t do something or respond to someone’s demands that it’s in some way going to be the end of the world. The reality is nothing is the end of the world and no meeting, client, expectation or demand is the end of the world or worth putting you and your health at risk for.
The reality is living in these current frenetic times requires time to stop, breathe and consider what will best serve you as an individual. It requires you to think of how you can best resolve the problem, how you can best spread the load in order to get the solution needed. Without judgment, without drama and without buying into chaos.
So as you start your day today take time to plan it and put into place realistic goals on what is possible for you to achieve. Take time to remember you have the choice on how you respond to pressure and you have the right to set boundaries for your own well being.
Nothing is the end of the world and nothing is so important that it is worth your personal well being. Everything has a solution sometimes you just need to ask for help or spread the load. It really really is that simple.